Two years ago during National Poetry Month (aka April) I posted a fragment of poetry on Twitter every day. It was really fun. I got a lot of response, likes and shares. Maybe the best part was finding Sparrow on Twitter. We follow each other now, which thrills me. I chose somewhat well known poets and fragments that were somewhat recognizable.
Last year I tried again. I picked some what obscure poets and obscure lines and ... the response was tepid. I didn't even finish the month.
Recently, when I was looking for my Borges for a shelving issue, I thought I might do all Borges poems this year. Then came the virus. I spent some time looking for fragments (from anyone) about isolation and illness but I'm not up to it. So I'm back to Borges.
I don't think I'll be as aware of the response because, despite the fact that I have an entire book of his poems, I'm not that familiar with him. I don't really know if I can slice out thirty fragment that don't seem disembodied. And Borges could be kind of a snot. I think it will be fun.
Maybe.
I guess we'll see.
Tuesday, March 31, 2020
Sunday, March 29, 2020
Listen
I want to be the person you come to when you're sad and you don't really want to cheer up. I try to just be present. Listen. The same with anger. If you need to vent I want to be the person who can just listen.
Sadness can become an attention getting device and anger can be abusive. I know that. I'm not trying to be a dumping ground. I just feel like it's important to feel through all the feelings we have.
Fear is different. I still try to listen and allow some space but fear is like a room full of fun house mirrors. Things become distorted. If I can shift a perception back to something more grounded I will try.
I don't feel a need to be positive but I've been trying to post things on Facebook that are resources or performances or funny. I don't usually do a lot of re-posting. No reason. I just figure people see things. Facebook and Twitter are swamped with fear at the moment. Of course they are.
I was oddly comforted hearing more than a few health professionals say that they didn't know things. Comforted because that's what feels true. It's the hardest thing. All the things we don't know. And all the things that keep changing. I read, or heard that masks weren't effective and because of the shortages in hospitals we shouldn't be wearing them. Now I'm hearing that even a homemade mask might help if only to stop the spread. And that makes sense. I touch my face all the time. I don't know if I always did and am just more aware of it now but it's crazy. If you have a mask on and you touch your face you minimize exposure. Not when your home but when you go out. I don't actually have a mask but I don't go out.
There was a video in which a doctor was giving advice about how to sanitize groceries. A day or so later there was a long post from a food scientist debunking lots of it. The one that stood out to me is not to wash your apples with soap. Because if you don't get soap rinsed off well enough you might have intestinal problems. All of the information about surfaces had me spinning out. Now I think it's probably OK if you wash your hands. There's lots of talk about how effective hand washing is. In any case it is a thing you can actually do.
This morning I read a post from a doctor describing how easy it is to pass the virus. This afternoon I heard a doctor saying you don't have to be too afraid to go to the store or see people. The shifts of opinions might be inevitable. I just know they have been winding me up from time to time.
The basics always apply. Distance. Try not to touch your face. Wash your hands. Keep your social circle small.
I'm not really having a lot of trouble with fear. I am in my nest with my books. There are cases in the area around me but not many. Certainly not as many as in New York, New Orleans or Italy. I do listen to a certain amount of news and troll Facebook and Twitter. But I'm keeping all of that down as well. Because this fear is hard to sort. It's very real. It is also subject to distortion.
Sometimes I think we confuse fear with sadness. We don't want to feel the overwhelming sadness that comes from knowing that so many people are dying and so many are sick. We don't want to feel the anger of knowing that doctors and nurses don't have the equipment they need. We feel the lack of control and agency. Fear becomes a default.
I will always listen.
It's all I have to give.
Sadness can become an attention getting device and anger can be abusive. I know that. I'm not trying to be a dumping ground. I just feel like it's important to feel through all the feelings we have.
Fear is different. I still try to listen and allow some space but fear is like a room full of fun house mirrors. Things become distorted. If I can shift a perception back to something more grounded I will try.
I don't feel a need to be positive but I've been trying to post things on Facebook that are resources or performances or funny. I don't usually do a lot of re-posting. No reason. I just figure people see things. Facebook and Twitter are swamped with fear at the moment. Of course they are.
I was oddly comforted hearing more than a few health professionals say that they didn't know things. Comforted because that's what feels true. It's the hardest thing. All the things we don't know. And all the things that keep changing. I read, or heard that masks weren't effective and because of the shortages in hospitals we shouldn't be wearing them. Now I'm hearing that even a homemade mask might help if only to stop the spread. And that makes sense. I touch my face all the time. I don't know if I always did and am just more aware of it now but it's crazy. If you have a mask on and you touch your face you minimize exposure. Not when your home but when you go out. I don't actually have a mask but I don't go out.
There was a video in which a doctor was giving advice about how to sanitize groceries. A day or so later there was a long post from a food scientist debunking lots of it. The one that stood out to me is not to wash your apples with soap. Because if you don't get soap rinsed off well enough you might have intestinal problems. All of the information about surfaces had me spinning out. Now I think it's probably OK if you wash your hands. There's lots of talk about how effective hand washing is. In any case it is a thing you can actually do.
This morning I read a post from a doctor describing how easy it is to pass the virus. This afternoon I heard a doctor saying you don't have to be too afraid to go to the store or see people. The shifts of opinions might be inevitable. I just know they have been winding me up from time to time.
The basics always apply. Distance. Try not to touch your face. Wash your hands. Keep your social circle small.
I'm not really having a lot of trouble with fear. I am in my nest with my books. There are cases in the area around me but not many. Certainly not as many as in New York, New Orleans or Italy. I do listen to a certain amount of news and troll Facebook and Twitter. But I'm keeping all of that down as well. Because this fear is hard to sort. It's very real. It is also subject to distortion.
Sometimes I think we confuse fear with sadness. We don't want to feel the overwhelming sadness that comes from knowing that so many people are dying and so many are sick. We don't want to feel the anger of knowing that doctors and nurses don't have the equipment they need. We feel the lack of control and agency. Fear becomes a default.
I will always listen.
It's all I have to give.
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