Wednesday, May 04, 2011


A sad truth about me is that I'm not really at home in the natural world. I like nature. Even a ride through the Presidio with the smell of Eucalyptus in the air makes me happy in the way only nature can. But I don't want to spend the night in a tent somewhere. This lack of comfort is especially true when it comes to animals. I love them. But I'm a little bit afraid of most of them.
Sunday I was sitting at the computer and I heard a bird chirping. It was so loud I figured it was right outside my kitchen window. Wrong. It was inside my kitchen window. Then it was flying around my living room. And I was out my front door. A humming bird the size of my big toe had chased me out of my home. Every time I tried to go back in the little guy flew around chirping. Intellectuality I knew I was being crazy but I was completely undone. Visions of Tippi Hendren danced in my head. Eventually the bird went back into the kitchen and I closed the door to the living room. After a realllly long time he flew out the window.

I've been trying to write a post about politics for a week or so. I think I used to do that a lot more often but these days I don't have much to say. I can go on and on. I can always go on and on. But, why? The left and the right sound the same to me. I agree with most of what the left has to say and cringe at the extreme right but so often they sound like resounding gongs and clanging symbols.
But then Republican Governors started trying to destroy Democracy and, oh lord! The push back! The push back is so amazing! And then there is the Arab Spring. It's like people are all standing up and saying: enough. It's all very encouraging. Scary and worrisome but also thrilling.
I heard about the release of the birth certificate first thing in the morning. I just felt sad. I understood why he did it but he should never have had to do it. After a day of listening to news talk I was back to being frustrated and angry. Was the wedding next? A day full of split screens with the wedding on one side and tornado destruction on the other. And of course the latest news. I liked the apparently not exactly MLK quote twice on Facebook.
It's been a wild ride and it seems like it may continue. I'm always filled with more than one emotion. Intellectually understanding and still feeling undone.

Later on Sunday I was having coffee in the Ferry Building where pigeons fly in and out and hover waiting for a dropped crumb. They never bother me.
Context is everything.