Friday, October 03, 2014

I Would Prefer Not To

If you've read Bartleby you will get the joke.
I'll be having my gall bladder removed on the 20th.
The surgeon is really cool. He is very clear and grounded. He said that it is harder to operate on fat people but "that's his problem." He has done this surgery on a 500 pound person. He has done it on an eleven year old person (which kind of freaked me out) and a person in their nineties. He said that there are general truths about who has gall bladder issues but there really isn't a type. Most people are walking around with some gall stones and a few of them will have problems. I think he said 20%.
At any other time of my life I would have asked for time to get acupuncture and drink miso and eat dark green leafy things and try to control it but I've been in some amount of pain and/or discomfort for about fifteen years. I'm tired. And most of the gall bladder stories I hear are middle-of-the-night worst-pain-ever stories. I'd like to avoid that.
The only thing worse than having surgery is knowing you're going to have it for 20 days. I'm pretty grouchy. I am scared but that seems normal. I do have confidence in the surgeon. I feel well cared for and safe in terms of all the medical professionals I've met in Hood River (except that knee guy).
I'm not thinking about writing or what I could write about or anything really. I'm in a sort of stun mode.
I would prefer not to.