Friday, June 15, 2012

Dependence


Every other week I go to see Barbara. It's a five or ten minute drive but it takes two buses, which can mean a half an hour or more. And because my balance has gotten so bad I've started taking a cab. The cab companies have SUVs and sedans. The SUVs are kind of hard for me to get in so I ask for a sedan. for weeks now they've sent a SUV. I called the company while we riding over, put the call on speaker and asked what I have to say or do to get the sedan. The dispatcher blamed the cabbie, which made the cabbie mad and he started yelling. Drama.
There are many times when the cab is late. The driver is rude. They won't pull into the driveway and it's harder for me to get in. So many things you don't notice when you don't need help. The weight of the door. The distance from where they let you out.
I am not used to it. I've been independent all of my life. I've walked everywhere. I've gotten on and off buses, trains, cabs. I've done what I needed to do.
Sometimes getting to the healing is an injury.
I got a great night of sleep last night. Really good.
And I got a great adjustment.
I started reading Sag Harbor because reading that piece by Whitehead reminded me how much I like his writing. Cheryl said to read some fiction and I thought it might be good to read something that would get me out of myself.
I feel a bit shut down.

6 comments:

lynnie said...

What is wrong with yr balance? That sounds scary.

lynnie said...

What is wrong with yr balance? That sounds scary.

Tish said...

I don't exactly know. It is scary though.

lynnie said...

Seems like it happens a lot to women with age. I don't understand why and I'm not looking forward to it. Do you use a cane? They can really help.

Tish said...

I can walk without a cane but if I'm somewhere outside I use two canes and/or a walker. I know a lot of older women who don't need these things so maybe you'll be one of them.

lynnie said...

My mom has bad knees. She got them fixed but now she has balance problems. My aunt has bad hips. I figure something will effect my mobility eventually.

A friend of mine says her balance has even off since menopause. I suggested maybe she had an inner ear infection. Turns out her balance problem is not related to ears, but the dr did find she had hearing loss and suggested a hearing aid. She hated that.